Speeches (Lines) for Mistress Page
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(stage directions). [Enter MISTRESS PAGE, with a letter] Mistress Page. What, have I scaped love-letters in the holiday-
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Mistress Ford. Mistress Page! trust me, I was going to your house. Mistress Page. And, trust me, I was coming to you. You look very
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Mistress Ford. Nay, I'll ne'er believe that; I have to show to the contrary. Mistress Page. Faith, but you do, in my mind. |
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Mistress Ford. Well, I do then; yet I say I could show you to the
Mistress Page. What's the matter, woman? |
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Mistress Ford. O woman, if it were not for one trifling respect, I
Mistress Page. Hang the trifle, woman! take the honour. What is
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Mistress Ford. If I would but go to hell for an eternal moment or so,
Mistress Page. What? thou liest! Sir Alice Ford! These knights
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Mistress Ford. We burn daylight: here, read, read; perceive how I
Mistress Page. Letter for letter, but that the name of Page and
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Mistress Ford. Why, this is the very same; the very hand, the very
Mistress Page. Nay, I know not: it makes me almost ready to
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Mistress Ford. 'Boarding,' call you it? I'll be sure to keep him
Mistress Page. So will I. if he come under my hatches, I'll never
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Mistress Ford. Nay, I will consent to act any villany against him,
Mistress Page. Why, look where he comes; and my good man too: he's
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Mistress Ford. You are the happier woman. Mistress Page. Let's consult together against this greasy knight.
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(stage directions). [MISTRESS PAGE and MISTRESS FORD come forward] Mistress Page. Whither go you, George? Hark you. |
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Mistress Ford. Faith, thou hast some crotchets in thy head. Now,
Mistress Page. Have with you. You'll come to dinner, George.
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(stage directions). [Enter MISTRESS QUICKLY] Mistress Page. You are come to see my daughter Anne? |
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Hostess Quickly. Ay, forsooth; and, I pray, how does good Mistress Anne? Mistress Page. Go in with us and see: we have an hour's talk with
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(stage directions). [Enter MISTRESS PAGE and ROBIN] Mistress Page. Nay, keep your way, little gallant; you were wont to
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Robin. I had rather, forsooth, go before you like a man
Mistress Page. O, you are a flattering boy: now I see you'll be a courtier. |
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Ford. Well met, Mistress Page. Whither go you? Mistress Page. Truly, sir, to see your wife. Is she at home? |
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Ford. Ay; and as idle as she may hang together, for want
Mistress Page. Be sure of that,—two other husbands. |
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Ford. Where had you this pretty weather-cock? Mistress Page. I cannot tell what the dickens his name is my
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Ford. Sir John Falstaff! Mistress Page. He, he; I can never hit on's name. There is such a
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Ford. Indeed she is. Mistress Page. By your leave, sir: I am sick till I see her. |
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Mistress Ford. What, John! What, Robert! Mistress Page. Quickly, quickly! is the buck-basket— |
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(stage directions). [Enter Servants with a basket] Mistress Page. Come, come, come. |
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Mistress Ford. Here, set it down. Mistress Page. Give your men the charge; we must be brief. |
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Mistress Ford. Marry, as I told you before, John and Robert, be
Mistress Page. You will do it? |
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(stage directions). [Exeunt Servants] Mistress Page. Here comes little Robin. |
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Robin. My master, Sir John, is come in at your back-door,
Mistress Page. You little Jack-a-Lent, have you been true to us? |
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Robin. Ay, I'll be sworn. My master knows not of your
Mistress Page. Thou'rt a good boy: this secrecy of thine shall be
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Mistress Ford. Do so. Go tell thy master I am alone.
Mistress Page. I warrant thee; if I do not act it, hiss me. |
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Mistress Ford. Pray you, do so: she's a very tattling woman.
Mistress Page. O Mistress Ford, what have you done? You're shamed,
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Mistress Ford. What's the matter, good Mistress Page? Mistress Page. O well-a-day, Mistress Ford! having an honest man
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Mistress Ford. What cause of suspicion? Mistress Page. What cause of suspicion! Out pon you! how am I
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Mistress Ford. Why, alas, what's the matter? Mistress Page. Your husband's coming hither, woman, with all the
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Mistress Ford. 'Tis not so, I hope. Mistress Page. Pray heaven it be not so, that you have such a man
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Mistress Ford. What shall I do? There is a gentleman my dear
Mistress Page. For shame! never stand 'you had rather' and 'you
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Falstaff. [Coming forward] Let me see't, let me see't, O, let
Mistress Page. What, Sir John Falstaff! Are these your letters, knight? |
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(stage directions). [Gets into the basket; they cover him with foul linen] Mistress Page. Help to cover your master, boy. Call your men,
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(stage directions). [Exeunt PAGE, DOCTOR CAIUS, and SIR HUGH EVANS] Mistress Page. Is there not a double excellency in this? |
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Mistress Ford. I know not which pleases me better, that my husband
Mistress Page. What a taking was he in when your husband asked who
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Mistress Ford. I am half afraid he will have need of washing; so
Mistress Page. Hang him, dishonest rascal! I would all of the same
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Mistress Ford. I think my husband hath some special suspicion of
Mistress Page. I will lay a plot to try that; and we will yet have
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Mistress Ford. Shall we send that foolish carrion, Mistress
Mistress Page. We will do it: let him be sent for to-morrow,
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Ford. I cannot find him: may be the knave bragged of that
Mistress Page. [Aside to MISTRESS FORD] Heard you that? |
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Ford. Amen! Mistress Page. You do yourself mighty wrong, Master Ford. |
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Fenton. Nay, Master Page, be not impatient. Mistress Page. Good Master Fenton, come not to my child. |
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Anne Page. Good mother, do not marry me to yond fool. Mistress Page. I mean it not; I seek you a better husband. |
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Anne Page. Alas, I had rather be set quick i' the earth
Mistress Page. Come, trouble not yourself. Good Master Fenton,
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(stage directions). [Enter MISTRESS PAGE, MISTRESS QUICKLY, and WILLIAM PAGE] Mistress Page. Is he at Master Ford's already, think'st thou? |
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Hostess Quickly. Sure he is by this, or will be presently: but,
Mistress Page. I'll be with her by and by; I'll but bring my young
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Hostess Quickly. Blessing of his heart! Mistress Page. Sir Hugh, my husband says my son profits nothing in
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Sir Hugh Evans. Come hither, William; hold up your head; come. Mistress Page. Come on, sirrah; hold up your head; answer your
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Sir Hugh Evans. 'Oman, forbear. Mistress Page. Peace! |
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Sir Hugh Evans. 'Oman, art thou lunatics? hast thou no
Mistress Page. Prithee, hold thy peace. |
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Sir Hugh Evans. It is qui, quae, quod: if you forget your 'quies,'
Mistress Page. He is a better scholar than I thought he was. |
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Sir Hugh Evans. He is a good sprag memory. Farewell, Mistress Page. Mistress Page. Adieu, good Sir Hugh.
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Mistress Ford. He's a-birding, sweet Sir John. Mistress Page. [Within] What, ho, gossip Ford! what, ho! |
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(stage directions). [Enter MISTRESS PAGE] Mistress Page. How now, sweetheart! who's at home besides yourself? |
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Mistress Ford. Why, none but mine own people. Mistress Page. Indeed! |
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Mistress Ford. No, certainly.
Mistress Page. Truly, I am so glad you have nobody here. |
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Mistress Ford. Why? Mistress Page. Why, woman, your husband is in his old lunes again:
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Mistress Ford. Why, does he talk of him? Mistress Page. Of none but him; and swears he was carried out, the
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Mistress Ford. How near is he, Mistress Page? Mistress Page. Hard by; at street end; he will be here anon. |
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Mistress Ford. I am undone! The knight is here. Mistress Page. Why then you are utterly shamed, and he's but a dead
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Falstaff. No, I'll come no more i' the basket. May I not go
Mistress Page. Alas, three of Master Ford's brothers watch the door
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Falstaff. I'll go out then. Mistress Page. If you go out in your own semblance, you die, Sir
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Mistress Ford. How might we disguise him? Mistress Page. Alas the day, I know not! There is no woman's gown
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Mistress Ford. My maid's aunt, the fat woman of Brentford, has a
Mistress Page. On my word, it will serve him; she's as big as he
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Mistress Ford. Go, go, sweet Sir John: Mistress Page and I will
Mistress Page. Quick, quick! we'll come dress you straight: put
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Mistress Ford. I would my husband would meet him in this shape: he
Mistress Page. Heaven guide him to thy husband's cudgel, and the
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Mistress Ford. But is my husband coming? Mistress Page. Ah, in good sadness, is he; and talks of the basket
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Mistress Ford. We'll try that; for I'll appoint my men to carry the
Mistress Page. Nay, but he'll be here presently: let's go dress him
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(stage directions). [Exit] Mistress Page. Hang him, dishonest varlet! we cannot misuse him enough.
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(stage directions). [Re-enter FALSTAFF in woman's clothes, and MISTRESS PAGE] Mistress Page. Come, Mother Prat; come, give me your hand. |
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(stage directions). [Exit FALSTAFF] Mistress Page. Are you not ashamed? I think you have killed the
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(stage directions). [Exeunt FORD, PAGE, SHALLOW, DOCTOR CAIUS, and SIR HUGH EVANS] Mistress Page. Trust me, he beat him most pitifully. |
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Mistress Ford. Nay, by the mass, that he did not; he beat him most
Mistress Page. I'll have the cudgel hallowed and hung o'er the
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Mistress Ford. What think you? may we, with the warrant of
Mistress Page. The spirit of wantonness is, sure, scared out of
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Mistress Ford. Shall we tell our husbands how we have served him? Mistress Page. Yes, by all means; if it be but to scrape the
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Mistress Ford. I'll warrant they'll have him publicly shamed: and
Mistress Page. Come, to the forge with it then; shape it: I would
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Page. And did he send you both these letters at an instant? Mistress Page. Within a quarter of an hour. |
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Mistress Ford. Devise but how you'll use him when he comes,
Mistress Page. There is an old tale goes that Herne the hunter,
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Page. Well, let it not be doubted but he'll come:
Mistress Page. That likewise have we thought upon, and thus:
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Mistress Ford. And till he tell the truth,
Mistress Page. The truth being known,
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Ford. That will be excellent. I'll go and buy them vizards. Mistress Page. My Nan shall be the queen of all the fairies,
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Ford. Nay I'll to him again in name of Brook
Mistress Page. Fear not you that. Go get us properties
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(stage directions). [Exeunt PAGE, FORD, and SIR HUGH EVANS] Mistress Page. Go, Mistress Ford,
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(stage directions). [Enter MISTRESS PAGE, MISTRESS FORD, and DOCTOR CAIUS] Mistress Page. Master doctor, my daughter is in green: when you
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Doctor Caius. I know vat I have to do. Adieu. Mistress Page. Fare you well, sir.
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Mistress Ford. Where is Nan now and her troop of fairies, and the
Mistress Page. They are all couched in a pit hard by Herne's oak,
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Mistress Ford. That cannot choose but amaze him. Mistress Page. If he be not amazed, he will be mocked; if he be
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Mistress Ford. We'll betray him finely. Mistress Page. Against such lewdsters and their lechery
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(stage directions). [Noise within] Mistress Page. Alas, what noise? |
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Page. Nay, do not fly; I think we have watch'd you now
Mistress Page. I pray you, come, hold up the jest no higher
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Falstaff. 'Seese' and 'putter'! have I lived to stand at the
Mistress Page. Why Sir John, do you think, though we would have the
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Ford. What, a hodge-pudding? a bag of flax? Mistress Page. A puffed man? |
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Page. Yet be cheerful, knight: thou shalt eat a posset
Mistress Page. [Aside] Doctors doubt that: if Anne Page be my
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Slender. I went to her in white, and cried 'mum,' and she
Mistress Page. Good George, be not angry: I knew of your purpose;
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Doctor Caius. Vere is Mistress Page? By gar, I am cozened: I ha'
Mistress Page. Why, did you take her in green? |
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Page. Now, mistress, how chance you went not with Master Slender? Mistress Page. Why went you not with master doctor, maid? |
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Falstaff. When night-dogs run, all sorts of deer are chased. Mistress Page. Well, I will muse no further. Master Fenton,
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